Monday the 14th Febuary 2005
Stupid Valentines Day . Thankfully this year I'm spending nothing then the cash needed to go out and have a good time....
JP and sarah have moved out... Sarahs heater overheated and broke the other day. Ten minutes more and it would have set the place on fire....
This would have meant it would have been impossible for me to get out at the time,I was asleep in my room. Luckily Sarah realised before she locked her door and left so I wasnt killed. however after this inciden I've looked at the fire extingusher. Why are we never taught how to use one at school. Green Cross code,first aid,how to reproduce,thats all fine but fire,nah balls to it.
What was intresting was the fact that for a short one hour period of my life it all sunk in im here to have a good time.Such things as Tom screaming on MSN at me for accidently sending me a virus and Grist trying to sound macho at me suddenly were just funny,not annoying at all.
I've not been asleep before 5am the last 3 nights. It could well be 4 tonight. This as all my mates from back home will agree with me is very strange.
After a regular night out to the Hobbit,Jamie,Rich,Rob,Marco,Ali,Larry,Myself and there was one oher...who was it..um...Tom.Yeah Tom. Anyway after being pissed,a 'special cigar' was passed around..(Which I declined Dad if your reading this) The mood and topic was relaxed as we discussed who was the Greatest Legend of them all....
Soon this turned into a debate and it led to only one way to decide a winner... A 16 way knock out tournament....
The Challengers....
Bodger and Badger - Well known kiddie programme with a bloke with a face you want to punch and his hand up a badgers ass
Chuckle Brothers -Officially have the biggest OAP fan base in England for any comedy duo. Everyones watched these legends
Bruce Foresyth - Look at the women he's had! A man who defies logic by having girlfriends getting younger as he gets older,thus defying the very laws of time itself.
Pat Sharp - Funhouse,mullet loving wearer who allowed kids to drive go karts with no license. Futhermore they were encouraged to lean out the vehicle with jousting sticks to pop balloons. This man is probably why there are so many road traffic accidents today
Phillip Schofield - Not sure who nominated Philly,doubt they'd admit to it. Solid enough guy who been there done that etc. Had a gopher up his ass for few years,looks good on any CV.
Bob Ross - Robs fav artist. Looks like Taffy. However only Rob knew him,limiting his chance of sucess
David Hasslehof - Drove a talking car and solved crime. Enough said.
Rolf Harris - Drinks his own urine everyday and puts animals to sleep while singing in Vets waiting rooms or painting women naked. Probably.
Richard Whitely - Swadeys favourite,the ever youthful richard still trying to get in Vodermans knickers while cracking a joke or two every round.
Richard Madely - Hero in my eyes for that Ali G impression. Never gives up trying to be funny and the stick he gets is not needed. Needs a younger wife to be up there with Bruce tho.
Lovejoy - Apparently I look like him with my leather jacket,hair and passion for solving crime.
Fred Dynage - Larry's favourite. Bloke who does How 2 and presents the news here. Has spent years teaching kids stuff that ont come up on their exam paper like how can I fly in a bottle of Rolf Harris stagnated urine.
Chaz and Dave - i presume for the fashion
David Dickenson - Needs no introduction. I was watching this man before he was famous. Now everyones on the band wagon.
Neil Buchanan - I once mentioned Neil Buchanan should advertise Oil of Ulay as he never ages. This led to a pic of him on our door,our pub quiz name changning to 'Buchanan's Boyz' and the catchphrase "Try it yourself" and "Give it a go" being used.
Noel Edmonds - Spent years teamed up with a fat blobby freak but so did Madely so it shouldnt hurt his chaces. Gives gifts to kiddies at Christmas bless him and embarress clebraties,or used to.
The draw...
ROUND 1
Bodger and Badger s VS Chuckle Bro's
Dissapointingly Bodger won this. Chuckle Bro's went out with a whisper
5 Vs 2
Bruce Foresyth Vs Pat Sharp
One of the biggest upsets of the day as Bruce goes out round one. There was a stunned silence in the room as we realised this and a tear formed in Robs eye. We'd grown up with Pat and could now identify with him living in a shit house now we were students. The mullet was just a bonus. Possibly if Bruce had worked with twins the outcome may be different.
3 Vs 4
Phillip Schofield Vs Bob Ross
Phillip must have been rubbing his hans at the easiest tie of the round, only one person knew Ross and so only one voted for him.
6 Vs 1
Dave Hasslehof Vs Rolf Harris.
I think the comment I made about Rolf drinking his piss before the voting gave him that little bit more attitude and respect.
2 Vs 5
Richard Whitely Vs Richard Madely
Battle of lunchtime TV was a no contest really. I think everyone is a bit of Richard Madely, a guy so desperate for friends he'll do anything or say anything. Quite sad but thats life.
2 Vs 5
Lovejoy Vs Fred Dynage
Led by Larry and as I wasnt voting,Lovejoy missed a crucial supporter it was almost a whitewash. Despite someone jumping onto the Lovejoy band wagon,it just wasnt enough to help him
2 Vs 5
Chaz and Dave Vs David Dickenson
Another upset which to this day I wont understand. Iasked for hands for Dave - 6. Then hands for Chaz and Dave - 3 . I think by now the drugs were kicking in... After a recount Chaz and Dave just pipped it
3 Vs 4
Neil Buchanan Vs Noel Edmonds
No contest,Neil is a bigger man and Edmonds ages more easily. Its going to take something special to knock Neil off and Edmonds aint it
6 Vs 1
Round 2
Bodger and Badger Vs Pat Sharp
Bodger cant beat kiddies tv programmes twice,not one like Fun house. Pat strolled all the way to the semi's with his hair following a few minutes later behind him.
0 Vs 7
Phillip Schofield Vs Rolf Harris
Problems for Phil when he came across tougher opposition. Rolf's variety in animals and not just Gophers and Fern Britton meant he was more respected.
2 Vs 5
Richard Madely Vs Fred Dynage
Finally a close match. Led by Larry the Dynage bandwagon kept going but Madely gave it his best. He left the arena with his head held high!
3 Vs 4
Chaz and dave Vs Neil Buchanan
Thankfully this nonsense was stopped. Not the tournament,the Chaz and Dave run.
1 Vs 6
4 left out of 16....
Suddenly this had got serious. The music was turned down as I randomly assigned the semi's.
Pat Sharp Vs Fred Dynage
4 3
Larrys crusade for fred to be placed among the imortals fell so close to the final. More people knew who Sharp was,its that simple. Unbelivably Shap had defeated the likes of Brucie and got all the way to the final.
Buchanan Vs Harris
This was the tightest round of the lotand was met with groans and many people torn. Buchanan won because of the support he'd had last few weeks but no shame for Rolf
4 3
3rd Place play off
Harris vs Dynage
Rolf wins it easily -simple as.
5 Vs 2
The Final.....
After 15 rounds of voting,here it was..
Two former work collegues,facing it off for the crown. One never aging,teaching kids how to "try it themselves" without having any art qualifications himself,the other responsible for inviting little kids to play in his house,bypassing all health and safety features. Most of them were hair related.
15 seconds of silence passed,time for people to think who they wanted.
15
!4
13
12
11
10
09
08
07
06
05
04
03
02
01
Result??
Buchanan wins 7-0
Great fun to have 4am Sunday Morning
"Try it yourself" and "Give it a go"
Byeeeeee
Word of the Day - Glitter
Ps Mark says hi
Stupid Valentines Day . Thankfully this year I'm spending nothing then the cash needed to go out and have a good time....
JP and sarah have moved out... Sarahs heater overheated and broke the other day. Ten minutes more and it would have set the place on fire....
This would have meant it would have been impossible for me to get out at the time,I was asleep in my room. Luckily Sarah realised before she locked her door and left so I wasnt killed. however after this inciden I've looked at the fire extingusher. Why are we never taught how to use one at school. Green Cross code,first aid,how to reproduce,thats all fine but fire,nah balls to it.
What was intresting was the fact that for a short one hour period of my life it all sunk in im here to have a good time.Such things as Tom screaming on MSN at me for accidently sending me a virus and Grist trying to sound macho at me suddenly were just funny,not annoying at all.
I've not been asleep before 5am the last 3 nights. It could well be 4 tonight. This as all my mates from back home will agree with me is very strange.
After a regular night out to the Hobbit,Jamie,Rich,Rob,Marco,Ali,Larry,Myself and there was one oher...who was it..um...Tom.Yeah Tom. Anyway after being pissed,a 'special cigar' was passed around..(Which I declined Dad if your reading this) The mood and topic was relaxed as we discussed who was the Greatest Legend of them all....
Soon this turned into a debate and it led to only one way to decide a winner... A 16 way knock out tournament....
The Challengers....
Bodger and Badger - Well known kiddie programme with a bloke with a face you want to punch and his hand up a badgers ass
Chuckle Brothers -Officially have the biggest OAP fan base in England for any comedy duo. Everyones watched these legends
Bruce Foresyth - Look at the women he's had! A man who defies logic by having girlfriends getting younger as he gets older,thus defying the very laws of time itself.
Pat Sharp - Funhouse,mullet loving wearer who allowed kids to drive go karts with no license. Futhermore they were encouraged to lean out the vehicle with jousting sticks to pop balloons. This man is probably why there are so many road traffic accidents today
Phillip Schofield - Not sure who nominated Philly,doubt they'd admit to it. Solid enough guy who been there done that etc. Had a gopher up his ass for few years,looks good on any CV.
Bob Ross - Robs fav artist. Looks like Taffy. However only Rob knew him,limiting his chance of sucess
David Hasslehof - Drove a talking car and solved crime. Enough said.
Rolf Harris - Drinks his own urine everyday and puts animals to sleep while singing in Vets waiting rooms or painting women naked. Probably.
Richard Whitely - Swadeys favourite,the ever youthful richard still trying to get in Vodermans knickers while cracking a joke or two every round.
Richard Madely - Hero in my eyes for that Ali G impression. Never gives up trying to be funny and the stick he gets is not needed. Needs a younger wife to be up there with Bruce tho.
Lovejoy - Apparently I look like him with my leather jacket,hair and passion for solving crime.
Fred Dynage - Larry's favourite. Bloke who does How 2 and presents the news here. Has spent years teaching kids stuff that ont come up on their exam paper like how can I fly in a bottle of Rolf Harris stagnated urine.
Chaz and Dave - i presume for the fashion
David Dickenson - Needs no introduction. I was watching this man before he was famous. Now everyones on the band wagon.
Neil Buchanan - I once mentioned Neil Buchanan should advertise Oil of Ulay as he never ages. This led to a pic of him on our door,our pub quiz name changning to 'Buchanan's Boyz' and the catchphrase "Try it yourself" and "Give it a go" being used.
Noel Edmonds - Spent years teamed up with a fat blobby freak but so did Madely so it shouldnt hurt his chaces. Gives gifts to kiddies at Christmas bless him and embarress clebraties,or used to.
The draw...
ROUND 1
Bodger and Badger s VS Chuckle Bro's
Dissapointingly Bodger won this. Chuckle Bro's went out with a whisper
5 Vs 2
Bruce Foresyth Vs Pat Sharp
One of the biggest upsets of the day as Bruce goes out round one. There was a stunned silence in the room as we realised this and a tear formed in Robs eye. We'd grown up with Pat and could now identify with him living in a shit house now we were students. The mullet was just a bonus. Possibly if Bruce had worked with twins the outcome may be different.
3 Vs 4
Phillip Schofield Vs Bob Ross
Phillip must have been rubbing his hans at the easiest tie of the round, only one person knew Ross and so only one voted for him.
6 Vs 1
Dave Hasslehof Vs Rolf Harris.
I think the comment I made about Rolf drinking his piss before the voting gave him that little bit more attitude and respect.
2 Vs 5
Richard Whitely Vs Richard Madely
Battle of lunchtime TV was a no contest really. I think everyone is a bit of Richard Madely, a guy so desperate for friends he'll do anything or say anything. Quite sad but thats life.
2 Vs 5
Lovejoy Vs Fred Dynage
Led by Larry and as I wasnt voting,Lovejoy missed a crucial supporter it was almost a whitewash. Despite someone jumping onto the Lovejoy band wagon,it just wasnt enough to help him
2 Vs 5
Chaz and Dave Vs David Dickenson
Another upset which to this day I wont understand. Iasked for hands for Dave - 6. Then hands for Chaz and Dave - 3 . I think by now the drugs were kicking in... After a recount Chaz and Dave just pipped it
3 Vs 4
Neil Buchanan Vs Noel Edmonds
No contest,Neil is a bigger man and Edmonds ages more easily. Its going to take something special to knock Neil off and Edmonds aint it
6 Vs 1
Round 2
Bodger and Badger Vs Pat Sharp
Bodger cant beat kiddies tv programmes twice,not one like Fun house. Pat strolled all the way to the semi's with his hair following a few minutes later behind him.
0 Vs 7
Phillip Schofield Vs Rolf Harris
Problems for Phil when he came across tougher opposition. Rolf's variety in animals and not just Gophers and Fern Britton meant he was more respected.
2 Vs 5
Richard Madely Vs Fred Dynage
Finally a close match. Led by Larry the Dynage bandwagon kept going but Madely gave it his best. He left the arena with his head held high!
3 Vs 4
Chaz and dave Vs Neil Buchanan
Thankfully this nonsense was stopped. Not the tournament,the Chaz and Dave run.
1 Vs 6
4 left out of 16....
Suddenly this had got serious. The music was turned down as I randomly assigned the semi's.
Pat Sharp Vs Fred Dynage
4 3
Larrys crusade for fred to be placed among the imortals fell so close to the final. More people knew who Sharp was,its that simple. Unbelivably Shap had defeated the likes of Brucie and got all the way to the final.
Buchanan Vs Harris
This was the tightest round of the lotand was met with groans and many people torn. Buchanan won because of the support he'd had last few weeks but no shame for Rolf
4 3
3rd Place play off
Harris vs Dynage
Rolf wins it easily -simple as.
5 Vs 2
The Final.....
After 15 rounds of voting,here it was..
Two former work collegues,facing it off for the crown. One never aging,teaching kids how to "try it themselves" without having any art qualifications himself,the other responsible for inviting little kids to play in his house,bypassing all health and safety features. Most of them were hair related.
15 seconds of silence passed,time for people to think who they wanted.
15
!4
13
12
11
10
09
08
07
06
05
04
03
02
01
Result??
Buchanan wins 7-0
Great fun to have 4am Sunday Morning
"Try it yourself" and "Give it a go"
Byeeeeee
Word of the Day - Glitter
Ps Mark says hi
posted by Gareth @ Monday, February 14, 2005
9 comments
